i've worked at camp for as long as some of my old heroes have, and i'm not even 20 yet.
i remember the night before i left for my first summer. i was 16 and innocent and mostly wanted to be an honorary camper. as in, hang out with all the old staffers that i loved, not have to be at home all summer, and while i had said since 8th grade that i wanted to be what my staffers were to me, i really had no idea how much that took.
a lot of crap went down that year. God taught me so much, and in such hard ways.
not that it wasn't a great summer. and given the chance to go back, i wouldn't do anything different. but i wish i had known how hard it would be. like a couple that has babies really early.
now, i'm at the front door of my fourth summer. and even though i know what i'm doing, i still feel so...small. i guess that's the right word.
my first year, the fourth years were britnie reid, elizabeth teal, porter, and maybe a couple others that i can't remember. i don't feel half as experienced or look-up-able as they were. i can't compare to them on any level. plus they were all at least 21.
so weird to think about. but the funny thing is, day 1's bible study is about jeremiah 1:4-10. even though i haven't looked over it half as carefully as i need to since i'll be teaching it to the new staff in 5 days, i do know that that passage is all about God telling him that just because he's young doesn't mean that he isn't called to great things.
i guess all this new responsibility is my great thing. and as unqualified as i feel, i'm holding tight to the fact that God thinks i can do it.
